KEYS TO EFFECTIVE RELATIONSHIPS

KEYS TO EFFECTIVE RELATIONSHIPS

6 Rs FOR EFFECTIVE RELATIONSHIPS

A human being is a relational being. You cannot avoid relationships in life. It maybe at family level, social level, organisational or institutional level. For these relationships to work parties to a relationship should utilise the keys below:

1. Respect
Many relationships fail because of lack of respect. Respect is mutual. Many  times we think it is the junior who should respect the senior. Respect is a matter  of the heart and has nothing to do with positions. There are many pastors who do not respect the congregation they lead, managers who do not respect their subordinates,  employers who do not respect their employees and even husbands  who do not respect their wives.  Respect is not demanded but earned. Many organisations are full of leaders who demand respect and they are surprised that the more they demand it the more they don't get it. If we understand that we are the image of God we will able to respect. However pride had limited many people to respect others in a relationship set up   Respect is hinged on the spirit of servanthood.

2. Reciprocity
Relationship building is a two way street way. Many people expect others to make effort to build a relationship when they are relaxed. It is abuse to expect one part to a relationship  to make effort to build a relationship. You have a role to play for that relationship to stand. If you want to be respected then respect also, if you want to be given, then start to give, if you want great company desire to be in company. Relationship is transaction which doesn't involve one person. In this transaction, when we help each other to build relationships, organisations, families and institutions will live in greatness.

3. Responsibility of actions
Relationships only survive because of responsibility of people  in the relationship. All the actions we do in a relationship we should be responsible for the them. Many relationships are made up of people who have a blame game. If anything goes wrong in a relationship and we are responsible , are we able to own up. Husbands shift blame when they mess up, some pastors shift blame when they mess up, directors shift blame when they mess up and the list goes on. This is bad  for any relationship. When a part to a relationship is blamed for actions they have not done they  are bound to shut down or switch off from that relationship.

4. Restoration
In any relationship setup , many a time there is bound to be crossing of paths. There are bound to be conflicts and disagreements. When that happens there should be restoration mechanisms. This include conflict resolution, forgiveness, counselling and so on. Many divorces, church splits, company shut downs were caused by people who didn't want to restore relations. It is sad that many institutions want to be great when using a wounded team. In the same institution, there are offended people and ones who have offended others. Many strained relations can be restored if we become realistic and understand that we need each other. Decide today to restore that relationship.

5. Receptive heart
A relationship is based on a receptive heart. Many people have closed hearts such that they are skeptic of any move to a relationship. You cannot grow in a relationship  whether institutional or social if you are not ready to receive another person in your heart. Some people, because of their background they have told themselves that they are unlovable. Sometimes it is because of inferiority complex. For you to be received, you should be able to receive others.

6. Roadmap
For any relationship to work there must be a road map. The road map include purpose and objectives of the relationship, the motive behind entering in that relationship and also relationship building blocks. Some relationships are not worth it. They waste time for you. Some relationships are temporary and some are permanent. Ask yourself,  why am I in that relationship.

John Museredzo is a pastor / author / business consultant / speaker. Contact +263775127589